The Gator sports blog Orange & Blue Hue consistently has some of the best writing on the web. Check out this quote from an article on the upcoming Florida @ Vanderbilt game:
You want a pushover wallflower opponent for Homecoming? [Vanderbilt] would be happy to oblige. The ‘Dores would like to storm the dance, pee in the pineapple punch, punch you in the balls, take your girlfriend behind the gym for an unrespectable encounter and then impress her parents with their Cotillion-refined manners.