There’s a guy in my office who surreptitiously records the absurd things we all say, then sends a company-wide email with his collection to ring in the new year.
Here are my out-of-context comments which made the list this year, and a few of my co-workers (with their names removed):
Mine:
- “David is a great name for a girl.”
- “We could all be dead in seven minutes.”
- “Who would drink orange juice with pulp?”
- “Rudolph’s dad is a dick.”
- “Rudolph comes from a long line of reindeer dicks.”
Co-Workers:
- “I have a couple thoughts on chili.”
- “But look at all those words I spelled correctly!”
- “Who doesn’t love wombats?”
- “The best way to get nothing done is to send an email to two people.”
- “I think most songs are about love, crappy things that happen, and death.”
- “I find chickens very persuasive.”
- “I neither love nor hate Jack White … kind of like cilantro.”
- “Peacocks are assholes.”
- “He looks like Barack Obama. If Barack Obama was a little albino and blind.”
- “Catamarans make great beds.”
- “Can we find a way to balance your desire to make it scalable, with my desire to have it not look terrible?”