Posts tagged “politics”

A boy is hitchhiking on a country road. A car stops for him, and the driver asks, “Are you a Republican or a Democrat?”

“Democrat,” says the boy, and the car speeds off.

Another car stops, and the driver asks, “Are you a Republican or a Democrat?”

“Democrat,” says the boy, and the car speeds off.

This happens two or three times, and the boy decides he’s giving the wrong answer. The next car that stops is a convertible driven by a beautiful blonde. “Are you a Republican or a Democrat?” she asks.

“Republican,” says the boy, and she lets him in.

But as they’re driving along, the wind from the open top begins to push the blonde’s skirt higher and higher up her legs. And the boy finds himself becoming aroused. Finally he can’t control himself any longer. “Stop!” he hollers. “Let me out! I’ve only been a Republican for ten minutes and already I feel like screwing somebody!”

from Republican Party Reptile, by P.J. O’Rourke, 1987

Elmo is the only non-human or puppet ever to testify before the U.S. Congress. At the request and with the assistance of Rep. Duke Cunningham, he testified before the House Appropriations Subcommittee on Labor, Health and Human Services and Education in April 2002, urging support for increased funding in music education.